Twelve days ago, I felt compelled to clean out my email accounts, and I came across a Kabbalah reading I received on May 8, 2010 from Susan Lynne, a psychic medium.
I had reached out to her because I was hoping she would have the answers I felt were eluding me at the time.
As I read her email, I found it is most interesting that the one message I needed to heed was the one I recently discussed (over 5 years later).
It would seem that in 2010, the teacher had appeared, and the student didn’t think herself ready/worthy of the teaching.
Therefore, it is my intention that this sharing will benefit you and where you are now on your journey! <3
[SIDEBAR: The Grammar Police Officer in me did some light editing. I added words to help the reading’s rhythm/message as well as added punctuation where needed. However, there were some instances where I left a sentence as I had originally received it. In-joy!]
I hope this reaches you in grand spirits. A million angels send hugs out to you (((((())))))!!! Now, your reading.
Regarding first question about if you are an older soul and the lessons you are here to learn.
Yes, without a doubt you are an older soul. There are no if’s, and’s, or but’s about it. I am being shown that in this lifetime, you are stuck. The one thing that you must do, to get yourself out of this holding pattern you have been in for quite some time, is to forgive yourself.
You may be saying, “What am I to forgive myself for?”.
Adonya, sweetheart, for way too long, you have kept yourself in full-blown ego/lower source energy. You have allowed fears to keep you from experiencing the unconditional love that you not only need but deserve. First and foremost, sweetheart, you must love yourself fully and completely.
Looking to the wisdom of the Kabbalah about this situation, Raphael and Jeremiel are giving direction and guidance as follows:
The past, present, and future all are melded together; occurring at once, so to speak. You are stuck, spiritually, in parts of your past as if time is standing still. I am being shown a snow globe. What is in the snow globe (your life) seems the same day in day out, never-changing, BUT around the snow globe, life is in constant perpetual movement.
What is time? That is what you are stuck in. Time is the distance between Cause & Effect. It is the space between activity and repercussions; separating action from reaction. The goal, and what you are meant to learn in this lifetime, is flexibility.
Your mission, if you choose to accept it, is for the next 3 months do something at least 2x or more a month that you have never ever done before. If you can find another to do that with, it would be amazing. The only rule is if doing it with another, they must also be a virgin, so to speak, to the activity. The reason behind this is to take all the expectations out of life. It forces you to experience with a clean slate.
Also, stop your immediate reaction to people, places, and things. When you take this action, you will open yourself up to spontaneity. Also, it is important for you to truly understand what is your ego fear-based voice you hear in your head from the voice you hear from Spirit. Spirit is your heart and will never guide you in fear.
You came here in this lifetime to not only plant some wonderful seeds but to enjoy them by opening your heart so they germinate, sprout and grow. The time is now, sweetheart, for you to the plant seeds of positive hope and joy.
Regarding second question about your fear of heights and allergies.
I am seeing so clearly that you had a life around the time of Milarepa (1040-1143) a Buddhist Saint, and you were in the high Tibetan mountain area. You were a great monk with incredible gifts. The fear you have of heights has to do with feeling, in this lifetime, that you are falling short of that amazing time where it was as though you were touching the face of God.
The heights represent giving up control and trusting and being – just being one with nature, the elements, and others without fear.
The allergies have a lot to do with not speaking your truth. At times, you feel as though you are absorbing everyone’s energy and never have any left for you.
The next 18 months is your time, sweetie, to start to hand over the ego/fears to your angels and go towards The Endless World.
Currently, you are living in a world separated in chaos and suffering. Your angels and spirit guides are directing you in your journey towards the Light. You are to take Light Action by sharing its essence with the Vessel (your body). In Kabbalah, The Endless World makes it impossible to distinguish between the Light and the Vessel. Know that it is all good; all one; all perfect love.
Archangel Jophiel, the Angel of Personal Spiritual Feng Shui, wants you to clear the cobwebs that are keeping you from Being. This lifetime is for you to truly allow yourself to love yourself and to let others into your life. No longer concentrate on what happened in previous lives; just be in the moment of this one fully.
Regarding your third question about the trouble you have praying/talking with/making the “God” connection.
Sweetheart, you had a lifetime in New England (Salem, Massachusetts), and you were killed for your healing abilities. Other times, in other lifetimes, you always felt on the outside looking in and afraid to speak your truth of who you are. Always hiding, hence, the allergies that are such an issue in this life.
You were also, in other lives, angry that God, in your mind, allowed you to befall such horrid situations; often times, at the hand of those who called themselves “Men and Women of God”.
God/higher source energy and the angels want you to know they understand your anger, and for you to know that it is okay. The message I am getting from God is to not pray to a source outside yourself for this Source is you, and you are the Source. God is a part of all things. The energy and vibrations being sent to you now are amazing.
God/higher source energy and the angels also want you to know that you deserve all the wonders this Universe can offer, and they love you totally, completely, and unconditionally. The most important love of all is for you to love yourself with your whole heart.
Adonya, they urge you to go forward in that direction.
Regarding your fourth question about softening your heart/being open to love
You are just beginning to work on correcting your mistakes (which is a lot of mistrust towards others). The key to this is speaking your truth in a kind and thoughtful manner; being the real Adonya. Being able to laugh at your worries, fears/ego/the demons (in a sense) that haunt you. I am seeing that no later than August you will be on the path towards seeking the hidden treasure the Universe has in store for you.
Archangel Zadkiel, the Teaching and Learning Angel, is here trying to help you to clearly hear your messages and go forth fearlessly.
Archangel Jophiel wants you to increase, bit by bit, your time outdoors. You must connect with nature.
Archangel Chamuel wants you to be at peace and to know you are loved.
Goddess Bast is coming forward to say that the independence you were born to experience will set a foundation that will bring peace and love your way, so embrace it.
Archangel Muriel, the Angel of Sweetness, says, “It is time for you to embrace your inner child and open yourself to joy you deserve so much.”
One of the first steps to opening your heart is to be in an attitude of gratitude, so keep a gratitude journal.
Every day, people talk about what bothers them; what they do not want; what they do not want to do; and what they dislike, but how much time do they spend verbalizing what they love? Little, if any.
What I would like for you to do is to commit 5 minutes, every day, to speaking with someone about what you love, and have them do the same with you.
It is pretty simple, and I will start, “I love the feelings, sounds, and smells that a light spring shower bring. I love the aroma of freshly brewed coffee. I love getting lost in imaginative Science Fiction.” Next, the person you are with chimes in. They may say, ” I love drinking hot chocolate while watching the first snow of the season.” or “I love the smell of buttery movie popcorn.”
I know you are already feeling better.
When we think of things we love, we feel love,
and when we feel love, we become love.
Being able to soften and open our heart to love is the first step to being in a perpetual state of love, and once we have achieved that, everything is possible.
Adonya, the time is now for you to embrace your gifts with joy not fear; to love yourself and know that you are an amazing spirit.
First step? Love yourself!
Second step? Let go and be!
[Post published at 10:42am Pacific during the hour of Venus. Angel number meaning for 1042: “God and the angelic realm are supporting your positive thoughts. As you meditate upon Divine love, you feel the depth of their love for you. Keep your thoughts focused on love, and call upon Heaven to re-center you when needed. Your prayers are manifesting, even if they aren’t visible yet.”]